There was, and still is, a sense of melancholy in me. Mostly when i see things in-retrospective.
Got updates and met a few not-so-old and long-time-never-meet friends. One is in die Schweiz. Seems his banking career is doing well. One is teaching music, with heaps of praises on him (talented lah...really, this guy). Then when i look back at myself, there is this sense of inferiority complex in me. In chinese, the phrase is 心理不平衡。
There is such a big gap, so big, that i feel amazingly useless. There's another story, it's regarding keys. I have this habit of misplacing my keys. Just did that two saturdays ago. Lost them. Duplicated a new pair. My housemate said that i never learn, which is true. And this is, in fact, a sad thing.
Suddenly i remember an old song from the past, from the past when i was still back in Penang, when brother have yet to go to US to study. He manage to get a full Scholarship to the US, then managed to get a Masters degree from the top varsity from the UK, now is lecturing in a College in KL. He listens to lots of songs, and he particularly liked Alanis Morissette. Here's a song sung by her,
"You Learn"
I recommend getting your heart trampled on to anyone
I recommend walking around naked in your living room
Swallow it down (what a jagged little pill)
It feels so good (swimming in your stomach)
Wait until the dust settles
You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn
I recommend biting off more then you can chew to anyone
I certainly do
I recommend sticking your foot in your mouth at any time
Feel freeThrow it down (the caution blocks you from the wind)
Hold it up (to the rays)You wait and see when the smoke clears
You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn
Wear it out (the way a three-year-old would do)
Melt it down (you're gonna have to eventually anyway)
The fire trucks are coming up around the bend
You live you learn
You love you learn
You cry you learn
You lose you learn
You bleed you learn
You scream you learn
You grieve you learn
You choke you learn
You laugh you learn
You choose you learn
You pray you learn
You ask you learn
You live you learn
